Can anyone translate this shakespeare monologue from merry wives of windsor?

Falstaff is telling Master Brook the story of what happened when Falstaff was at the home of a married woman and was trying to have an affair with her, when her husband came home. He explains how he was carried out of the house in a laundry basket which still had a few stinky clothes in it. The jealous husband didn't know he was in the basket and so let him p. Falstaff complains because he's really fat and it was uncomfortable being stuffed in the basket, and also that it was beneath his dignity. But the worst part was when the basket was emptied into the cold water of the Thames River and he went from being overly hot and stinky to cold and wet.